Woolworths Fast and loose
More on Woolies’ new NOW NOW fast food adventure. Being Woolies, the offering is of course super-healthy, with light meals and snacks, coffee from beans sourced exclusively in Africa, and such hipster fare as wraps, bowls, pots and buns… wait a minute, that’s disgu… oh, not man-buns, the other kind… and lots of gluten-, dairy- and wheat-free options. There are also smoothies and juiced "shots" of the sort that momentarily give you the shakes and make you feel all hyper and energetic until you realise that that’s just the effect of having forked out R20 for something you could have scraped from the underside of your lawnmower for free. And all of this, you will be happy to know, is achingly on-point vis-à-vis the global trend of queuing up for salads while checking Tinder on your smartphone in a howling southeaster.
Comment: Nice one, Woolies. We’ll join that queue any day.